Dad Doesn't Want to Pay For Daughter's Tuition Because She Lied About Her Major & Reddit is Coming for Him
Should parents be able to dictate their child's major for tuition money? Your answer to this question will likely influence your reaction to this recent Reddit AITA post. A father told the forum that he originally agreed to pay his daughter's tuition because she said she was going to major in computer science. He was afraid she would study illustration, a subject she's really interested in, because he didn't think there would be enough steady work. So brilliant! Computer science and a wide range of career opportunities, he thought.
Then he found out that his daughter had lied. “She studies illustration. She got mail about an art show at her school," he wrote. "I didn't think anything of it at first because I knew she was studying computer science. After investigating a bit more, I found out that her work was selected for the exhibition.”
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The father was angry. They had agreed that the tuition money would benefit a specific course. He told her he would no longer support her and that she would have to pay for college herself, ask her mother to pay, or, he added, "she could start paying me back the money she stole from me, interest-free." His wife disagrees. She thinks it is unreasonable to ask her daughter to pay her tuition herself. However, he stands firm.
"Now my wife and daughter are mad at me," he wrote. "I'm starting to reflect and I think maybe I could have been nicer about the situation."
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The Reddit dad received a lot of feedback — most of which told him he was wrong. Many people stressed that getting a degree in illustration is not an impractical decision and there are many jobs in this field and lucrative paying jobs too! A former college counselor also chimed in to make a very valid point about major choices. "You would have wasted your money paying for a degree she didn't want," the user wrote. "If she didn't want to learn it for four years, why do you think she wants to do it all day, every day, for the rest of her life? Statistically, she would almost certainly have dropped out or changed paths within five years.”
Others pointed out that his daughter's work would be on display and that was something to celebrate, not to dismiss. The lie, many told him, is not the part of the equation he should focus on.
"YTA. Yes, so she lied about her intended major and you are disappointed in her for lying to you,” one user noted. "She is doing so well that she is a part of something exciting and really important to her and it will look GREAT on her CV!! THIS is more important than a few white lies. Be ready and willing to support her by congratulating her when she deserves it.”
The father is obviously concerned about how he handled this situation. Now the big question remains. What can he do next and how can he correct his actions? Some suggested he visit their art show and offer their support as a first step (in addition to continuing to pay their tuition!). What do you think he should do?
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