Drew Barrymore opens up about ‘demons’ from her father: He ‘looked so out there’

Drew Barrymore shared an open post about her late father, actor John Barrymore, and told what it was like to grow up with an unconventional and sometimes complicated father.
"My mother chose a wild card for my father," wrote the 45-year-old actress in an Instagram homage to her father, who died in 2004. Barrymore shared a relapse photo of her parents, John and Jaid Barrymore, with one together the night before their birth.
John Drew Barrymore (Frank Edwards / Getty Images)
"He was a crazy hedonistic poet, child! But I understood that as a child. Somehow I have no problems with luggage or dad," she said. "I think I would have loved to have a father who didn't look out like that. Or who stayed. Or was capable of anything. But his ferocity permeates me. His gifts are here. His demons to be overcome are mine to break! "
When she grew up, Barrymore said she was aware that her father was different.
John and Drew Barrymore (Time & Life Pictures / The LIFE picture collection above)
"I love him not for who I wanted to be, but for who he was. And when I look at all the photos of fathers doing their father's job today, there is sure to be my little self that wants him to fit . " But he never did. And I'm not sure I did it either, "she said.
Barrymore was open about her past teen drug abuse and the rocky relationship she had with her mother. Barrymore, the mother of two children of daughters Olive (7) and Frankie (5), said she could look back on her childhood and see what lessons she received from her parents.
Drew Barrymore and daughter Frankie Barrymore Kopelman (Gary Gershoff / WireImage)
"My two parents played an important role in who I am as a parent. And none of it looks perfect. But it works with so much love. And togetherness. And availability," she said.
While her Father's Day tribute might look different than other people's, Barrymore said she was proud of her story.
"I don't have a picture of a father today to show how great everything was. I have a picture to show what it was. And that's my story. And that's perfect in itself," she said. "My father gave me the gift of life! An evil sense of humor! And this wildness that I really appreciate."

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