Meghan Markle Reveals Recent Miscarriage In Powerful Essay

In an article for The New York Times, Meghan Markle reports on the loss she and Prince Harry suffered earlier this year
In a powerful essay for the New York Times, Duchess of Sussex Meghan Markle reveals that she and Prince Harry miscarried this July.
“It was a July morning that began as usual on any other day: making breakfast. Feed the dogs. Take vitamins. Find the missing sock, ”she writes. “Take the rogue pencil that rolled under the table. Throw my hair into a ponytail before getting my son out of his crib. "
Markle describes the feeling of a "sharp cramp".
"I dropped to the floor with him in my arms and hummed a lullaby to keep us both calm. The happy melody was a stark contrast to my feeling that something was wrong," she says. "I knew when I clutched my firstborn child that I was losing my second."
"Hours later, I was lying in a hospital bed holding my husband's hand," she writes. “I felt the moisture in his palm and kissed his knuckles, wet from both of our tears. I stared at the cold white walls and my eyes glazed over. I tried to imagine how we would heal. "
Markle recalls the famous moment during the couple's 2019 tour of South Africa when a reporter interviewing the actress asked, "Are you okay?" She admits that her honest answer was widely accepted by mothers.
"My off-the-peg answer seemed to give people permission to speak their truth," she writes. "But it didn't answer honestly, which helped me the most, it was the question itself." Thank you for asking, "I said." Not many people asked if I was okay. "
Now Markle links her heartbreaking loss to the terrifying year we all lived through. "As I sat in a hospital bed and watched my husband's heart break as he tried to hold my broken pieces, I realized that the only way to heal is to ask first, 'You can you well? '"
Markle describes the nerve-wracking experiences that became obnoxiously common in 2020. The unexpected loss of a parent, the illness and death a few days later, the deaths of Breonna Taylor and George Floyd, forced America to grapple with its long history of systemic racism. “Peaceful protests turn violent. Health quickly shifts to disease, ”she writes. "In places where there was fellowship there is now division."
She outlines how this country has divided in recent years. "We don't just argue about our opinions on facts. We are polarized about whether the fact is actually a fact. We disagree about whether science is real. We disagree about whether an election was won or lost. We disagree about the value of compromise. "
Markle shares a teenage experience when she was driving a taxi in NYC and spotted a woman crying on the sidewalk. She remembers asking the driver if he should drive by and if she's okay. He told her not to worry that someday someone would help her and ask if she was okay. With the pandemic driving us all into isolation, further apart than ever, Markle regrets not asking the woman if she needed help. "I wish I could go back and ask my taxi driver to pull up," she says. “I realize that this is the danger of a silly life - where sad, scary, or sacrosanct moments are all lived alone. Nobody stops asking, "Are you okay?"
She notices the stigma of miscarriage - and why she felt compelled to speak up. “In the pain of our loss, my husband and I found that in a room with 100 women, 10 to 20 of them had miscarried. Despite the amazing commonality of this pain, the conversation remains taboo, full of (unjustified) shame and continues a cycle of lonely grief. "
So in the end, she decided to share her own heartbreaking experiences. “We have learned that the burden of grief is often lightened when people ask how any of us are doing, and when they really listen to the answer with an open heart and mind - for all of us. By being invited to share our pain, we take the first steps towards healing together. "
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