Paris Jackson’s Dim Memories of the Days After Dad Michael Jackson Died Make So Much Sense

Paris Jackson gets real about how the death of father Michael Jackson at the age of 11 affected her. She shared her painful feelings with Willow Smith on the latest episode of Facebook Watch's Red Table Talk.
The loss of a parent (her only parent!) At such a tender age affected every aspect of her life after that sad day in June 2009. In the dark days after his death, she admitted that she was not "aware" of it, I'll keep going '”- Thoughts. Instead, the Let Down singer decided to obey what the adults around her told her to do. She describes an incredibly isolating and lonely experience that followed. "Okay, I live here now and, okay, I'm going to school now and I'm no longer home schooled and I'll just do what I'm told," she said to Smith. "Because I didn't really have a lot of guidance."
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It is quite normal not to remember much of what happened after a traumatic event because everything is numb, but processing these emotions as an adult is very different from how a child deals with those tragic moments in life. It could be why Paris struggled with depression and sexual identity in her teenage years because she had no outlet in the very conservative Jackson family to share her feelings. This is what makes her recent public vulnerability and authenticity so refreshing - she's been through some really tough times but is not hiding behind her journey.
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The beautiful thing Paris learned is to take on the special roles of Michael and carry on his legacy through her music and personal life. She remembers “the good manners” he taught her, as well as “humility, compassion, tolerance, just being kind to other people”. But the most useful piece of advice the pop star gave her was "be nice to yourself". "It's just the normal way I keep that memory alive and do whatever I can to make him proud," she said. For Paris, this will never wash away the agonizing days after losing her father, but it probably helps her keep him in her heart.
Before you go, click here to see which celebrity kids lost their parents too early.
Terri Irwin, Bindi Irwin, Robert Irwin at the induction ceremony for Posthumous Star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame for Steve Irwin, Hollywood Boulevard, Los Angeles, CA April 26, 2018.
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